


relapse uwu

by Mariiii



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Oneshot, PTSD, Reader Insert, Self Harm, Self Insert, basically sans finds out about your relapse and y'all talk, blood mention, depressed reader, reader is female but can be interpreted as whatever, sans/reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:34:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23976073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mariiii/pseuds/Mariiii
Summary: Just a short oneshot. Sans finds out u relapsed and shit happens. Reader has PTSD, so it's sad at first but there's a happy ending and it will make u feel better if u relate lol.
Relationships: Sans (Undertale)/Reader
Comments: 7
Kudos: 62





	relapse uwu

**Author's Note:**

> (this is my first time uploading a fic cause i turned 18 yesterday XD i've been writing sans since 2015 but i still suck at it i'm sorry o.o) comments are much appreciated but i'm aware the writing isn't great i didn't try my best i be tired ;w;

"you know better than to do this, angel." Sans whispers, water in the tub sloshing back and forth as he runs a washcloth over your thighs. The blood seeps from your wounds, diluted by the water. 

"...I know."

Sans leans over the side of the tub, resting his skull on his free hand. He sighs. 

"I'm sorry." You murmur, feeling your throat tighten up. You know he's disappointed in you. It hurts so much. 

"don't apologize." 

He hasn't talked much since he found out you relapsed again. Of course, there was no way he wouldn't have found out. You don't know why you thought you could get away with it. You just wished he would talk to you--get angry, cry, comfort you...anything but silence.

When he gets like this, there's no way to tell what he's thinking. Even now, as you dared to glance his direction, he just looks lost in thought. The worst part is the fake smile he's plastered on his face. It's the same one he had for months after you first met. You can't help but feel terrified.

Does he hate you for this? Would he break up with you? Would he get angry and threaten to kill you just like your parents did? Maybe you should leave before that happens. You can't take any more trauma. You fucked up, and you no longer deserve him. You should just leave. How should you go about this...

"'m done." His voice brings you back from his thoughts. 

He reaches down to unplug the drain and you rise from the tub as he hands you a towel. You pat your thighs dry, then wrap the towel around you.   
Sans pats the side of the tub, motioning for you to sit down, then moves to rummage through the cabinets. You do as he says, nearly shaking from fear. 

You didn't want to have to leave him. You wish you didn't fuck up. Why did you do this? You ruin everything.

He returns with a pack of bandages, sticking a couple on the deepest cuts. 

"get dressed. i'll be in my room." He finally looks you in the eyes, leans down to press his teeth to your forehead, and leaves you alone in the bathroom. 

You can't hold back the tears anymore. You sob for what feels like hours, hugging yourself with the towel and hoping that you weren't being too loud. Your face felt hot, and you were shaking. All you wanted was to cut again. You had the nerve to want to do this again. 

Would Sans even be okay if you left? Would he recover? Surely he doesn't care that much. He could do much better than you, if you were being honest. You're sure that he could find someone else to love and someone else that would adore his brother. Papyrus might miss you, but he'd be alright. You're not worth anything to anyone. 

You couldn't help but let out a loud sob as you thought about never seeing Sans again. You loved him more than anything. But he doesn't deserve the pain of having to deal with a selfish person like you. This was something you had to do. It was for his benefit.

Eventually, you managed to dress yourself and muster up the courage to leave the bathroom. You had to do this. It would hurt now, but it's for the best.

You knocked on Sans' door, shakily pushing it open once you heard the "come in" from the other side. The lights were off, thank god, but it was hard to conceal your sniffing. Your nose always got stuffy when you cried. 

He was laying on his bed, phone in hand. 

"hey." You can't bring yourself to respond. "...you were in there for a while." He muses, looking up at you. You just nod.

"...you been cryin?" You flinch at his words.

"I'm sorry!" You're already holding back tears again.

"hey, it's ok? come here..." He sounds anxious, suddenly, and holds his arms out to you. You crawl in the bed and into his lap. You're so tall you have to rest your head on his skull, but you've learned to make it work. He reaches up to pet your hair. 

"did i upset you?" He whispers. 

"No..." You tremble. You just didn't want to leave him. 

"talk to me." 

Tears start to fall once again. You sob quietly against his skull. 

"hey! hey, what's wrong?! look at me." He sounds urgent, so you pry yourself from him to face him, avoiding his gaze as you wipe your eyes with your sweater. 

"...please, tell me what's wrong." 

"I...I ruined everything. I don't wanna lose you." You sob. Everything feels so overwhelming, you feel close to a panic attack. It feels like the world is crumbling around you.

"what?? you're not gonna lose me, i'm right here." He reaches up to cup your face in his hand, attempting to wipe your tears. You shakily lean into his touch. "why do ya think you're gonna lose me?"

"I made you angry. I ruined our trust. I'm just a bad person that's making your life miserable." You whimper. 

"what? angel, i'm not angry. i was never angry." He speaks quickly, then sighs. "...'m sorry. i just...needed a minute to process this...i don't know what to do." His voice falters. 

"You have no reason to be sorry. It's all my fault. I'm trying to stop, but I didn't and it's my fault this is happening." 

He's silent for a moment. 

"...listen. we'll figure this out, ok? i'm not leaving." He pauses. "i just...i know i can't ask ya to stop. i wanna help you. but i don't know how." He reaches to wrap his arms around you, pulling you close to him as he buries his skull in your chest.

"i...it hurts to see you hurting. i just wanna fix it." He starts to tremble. "but i can't..."

He sounds so helpless. 

"Sans..." You whimper, hugging him tight. "You're not responsible for this. It's my fault. I chose to do this. I just have to learn to stop..." 

"i care about you...i love you. please tell me you know you're loved." He mumbles. Is he crying? You feel your heart break into a million pieces. You feel so guilty.

"I...I'm trying to understand. It's not you. It's just so hard to feel like I have worth..." You gently pet his skull as he trembles beneath you.

"how can i help you understand?" 

"It's not your job to make me understand. It's my responsibility to work on my mental health. But...I want you to know you've done so much for me. It's been so long since I relapsed...I...I actually felt better for a long time. Because of you. But sometimes I just get sucked into the past, and I forget how much love I have here." You can't help but ramble. "Sans, I love you more than anything. You've been nothing but good to me. That's all you can do. The rest is on me." 

"...ok." He finally says, sighing into your chest. "as long as you're workin' on this. please, lemme know if there's anything i can do."

"I will, but you're doing just fine, Sans. You help me so much already."

"ok." His voice is still shaky, but he seems to be calming down. "i love you."

"I love you too." You kiss the top of his skull.

"just...let me hold you, please." He whispers.

"Okay." You mimic his soft tone, gently petting him and rubbing his back.

You're starting to calm down as well, allowing yourself to feel safe in his arms. Your plans to leave seem so out of place now. How could you have convinced yourself he doesn't love you? 

He loves you. For him, you're gonna work on this.


End file.
